I've been currently using dating sites again and right now its a living hell for me. I agree with the guy below that being alone for the past decade for me has been quite maddening. I'm a 39 year old male that lives alone in a 2 bedroom apartment, and I've never had kids. Getting severe bouts of depression every once in while and some very emotionally crushing anguish about what could have been. And the worst part is It lasted almost 4 years and was very serious that we wanted to get married.
Something just clicked once we got to know each other better. And unfortunately we ended up mutually agreeing to break up due to some extremely horrible external pressure and didn't want to see each other suffer. Nobody cheated, nobody hated the other, and it wasn't an issue with our families.
Thank you economic "recession". She even wanted to find a job to keep us afloat, but due to our situation it wouldn't have been good for her being a foreign national not legally registered to work. She recently got in touch with me again after 10 years to catch up and see how I was doing. If it weren't for the fact that her life has advanced much more than mine, it would have been no trouble for us to get back together. I'm not getting anywhere involved with her again except on a friendship basis.
Her husband is providing her with the life I wanted to, and she has the family life that we could have had. And I refuse to be involved romantically at all. The time has passed, and the clock cannot be turned back. It's been hard as hell trying to find that kind of loving and understanding relationship again. I'm not expecting the same exact thing as what I had My recent experiences on the dating website I use has been pretty pathetic. I received one direct response from what appears to have been a scammer, as their profile has been removed within a day of being put up.
I've only gotten 2 smiles one from the scammer. The one reply I received from a woman I wrote, apparently she was looking for sexual relationship only. I didn't entertain that idea any further and informed her of a site she could use to satisfy her needs if she wasn't looking for natural dating. Another woman responded to a message I initiated and while this one seemed normal I'm worried that I as a man looking for a real relationship that results in marriage, I will end dying childless.
My mother hasn't been much help as she believes that for some reason I should be able to have children when I'm I calculated my life expectancy and I told her I needed to at least no later than my early 40s as there would be another 20 years to raise a child into reasonable adulthood and not be so old when and if there may be grandchildren I'll still be able to function. No response is equal to "maybe she didn't read it or get to see it" in guy logic.
Men do have more competition than women. I want to ask women Or even better yet. I've sent 39 messages in the past 3 weeks alone and only got 2 legitimate responses. I have been on on line dating for just over a year.
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Unfortunately no luck so far. I have met a couple of scammers and thankfully caught on before investing too much time. I am a bit older 53 very secure and confident. I consider myself a decent, good looking woman who is fit with just a few extra pounds. In the past year I have sent messages at least men and gotten 0 responses back. I have received a lot of messages asking to " hook up" etc I have been ghosted by 3 of them when I thought the conversations were going well I have learned to listen to those little red flags that 20 years ago I would have ignored. Yes I have had the messages straight up about sex but I just ignore those I get interests from guys that live thousands of miles away even though I clearly state I am not interested in a long distance relationship.
The guys I message are ones who's profiles interest me and who I see some common interests. But as I said before, I rarely get an answer. It leaves me wondering just what are they looking for and perhaps I am just not "hot" enough for them. That's ok, I am still happy, still me, still single, just a bit perplexed but I have not given up.
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I was on the dating site OkCupid. I met this Australian man who profile name was Ayapi.
Rejection is built into online dating. Politeness should be too | Keren Levy
He was asking for sex in two minutes of talking to me. He also was on Plenty Of Fish.
He have a sex website online with a lot of nude women. He was trying to get me to take nude pictures and videos. I met other scammers on OkCupid as well. One went to jail for scamming people out of money. They don't care who use their site. It's a danger for the women and for some men.
Online dating has NEVER worked for me, even when I was serious about it I was meeting the guys who were serial daters and not looking for a relationship or con artist or scammers who were looking to mooch off of a women and then of course the perverted guys that were looking to hook up, they made it known immediately what they wanted to do with you sexually. It sucked to me. I'm happy for the people who go on to find real relationships from these sites, I've had zero luck. I'm not surprised at your results. The men weren't feisty with your profile because it's not what they are lusting after.
Men are only angry at profiles of the trophy girls who respond with iciness, insults or silence. She must be thin, usually blonde with light eyes, primarily Caucasian. Use that profile pic and you'll see the firestorm of interest.
With the chick you used the men will only be nice because they're not ego invested in her at all. Also you didn't turn any of the men down to get a response. So you didn't give them a reason to invest in you. Just wait until you turn guys down as a blonde.
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That's when you better put up your photon force fields. All those blogs you read of women being confronted with nasty emails are basically white chicks bragging that they are the coveted princesses in this country. They have a litany of suitors after them who see them as dating status symbols and they set up blogs basically to complain to the world that the population of men isn't picture perfect like in a Maxim magazine. The white chicks are so used to the endless attention they make a sport of rejecting these guys or luring the guys on with empty promises for fun.
It's this random chaos and disrespect the men deal with when pursuing their dream girls that is the source of all online vitriol. So when the girls turn these guys down they get revenge emails like balls of fire. Your chick is just a boring safe brunette so who cares what she does? The chick you put up isn't anyone's idea of a girlfriend, more like a one night stand. That's why you got no controversy from her. I've only used okcupid. A woman, 29 years old, been on for 6 months. My experience is not very pleasant as well.
I find it strange, that so many men here say, that they are looking for a relationship. Yes, its true, that most women get lots of attention, but that doesn't mean anything. All girls that i know, want to find an actual boyfriend, and hopefully, eventually, someone to move in with, get married, have kids etc. But the vast majority of the guys just want to "chill and netflix". Sometimes, i feel like women are a bit more honest.